Chase the Pain: A Dark Mafia Billionaire Romance (Amatucci Family Book 1) Read online

  She tossed the towel at my face. “I could be down for that.” She smiled. It was all teeth. It dissolved as she looked down at my legs again. “What are we going to do?”

  I shook my head. “I make pastries and delicious confections. Human anatomy and healing it are far outside my wheelhouse.”

  Tali shoved her arms into the sleeves of her robe. “I’ll go get Rafe. Ask him what we need to do.” She ran from my bedroom, robe flapping in the breeze of her wake.

  “I’ll stay here. Don’t you worry about me.” I laid back down on the bed, hands on my tummy. “We’ll get you fed, little fella. Don’t you worry.”

  I’d had some seriously screwed up dreams last night. Tumbling down flights of stairs at the hospital, I’d almost killed some rando who’d come from the oncology ward. Instead of dropping me on my neurotic ass, he’d donned some shiny armor and carried me to safety. Dream me had some serious flirt skills. I was kinda jealous of her…me…whatever.

  “Fuck,” a man said. His voice was unfamiliar.

  I jerked to face the bedroom door.

  The large guy from last night was standing there, his bright green gaze attached to my legs. “What the fuck happened?”

  “How did you get in here? You have five seconds before I start yelling down the house.” I inhaled as I counted to five as fast as possible. Just as I opened my mouth to bring in the troops, Dom came in.

  “Wrong room, fucker. Keep looking at her, and I’ll gouge your eyes out.”

  The blonde guy rolled his eyes. “Again with the threats, Domenico? What happened?” He jutted his chin out at me.

  Dom came around the corner of the bedroom. His butterscotch eyes were as big as platters when he spotted me. “Will, what the fuck?”

  I snapped the sheet over my disgusting legs. “Nothing. Tali went to get Rafe. Why’s he here?” I asked Dom as he came over and pulled the sheet away.

  He ran his fingertips down my calves, his touch so light that if I hadn’t seen him do it, I wouldn’t have known he had. When he looked up at me again, his eyes had taken on that peculiar glow of furious anger. “I’m going to kill him.”

  I jerked back. “All he did was not offer me some food. I don’t think you need to kill him for that.” My stomach growled again, clearly siding with Dom.

  Dom’s eyes crinkled at the corners. “Not Penn. Cavendish. The asshole who—”

  “Knocked the table into me.” I nodded. “Yeah, Rafe told me. Is he really being charged?”

  “Damn straight he is,” Mr. Penn said. “So is his daddy.” He shot me a smile when I looked at him.

  I shook my head to clear it of the fuzz his smile brought. “I’m sorry, what’s your name again?”

  Dom snorted as he rose to his feet.

  The other man looked a little nonplussed at my question. “Ry—” he cleared his throat. “Ryker. Ryker Penn.”

  “Hi again, Ryker. How do you know the Cavendishes?”

  “Business,” he said simply.

  I nodded. I was familiar with the concept of not asking too many questions. “And you’re standing in my home why?”

  His eyes crinkled as the corner of his mouth kicked up in a lopsided grin. “You told me I needed to put you in my bed or yours. I was just checking to see where your bed was for future reference.”

  I shook my head. I’d never said anything like that in my life. Dom growled. “He’s here, in your home, because the man can’t find his way out of a dry paper sack.”

  “Isn’t it supposed to be a wet paper sack?” I asked.

  “I can make it wet if you want it to be,” Ryker said.

  I smiled. “Paper sacks are your thing, huh? I’d say kinky, but that just sounds bothersome.”

  He tipped his head back and laughed.

  Dom snarled. “Don’t encourage him, Will. He’s worse than Turo.”

  My eyes widened. Turo was a manslut of epic proportions. Like if Zeus and Eros had a baby. “Good thing I’m not interested.” I ran my hand down Dom’s cheek. Looked deep into his eyes. “I’d go without sex for the rest of my life. It’s not worth the hassles anyway.”

  Dom smiled. “Good answer, Will.”

  “That’s a terrible answer. Where did you get that kind of shit idea?” Ryker asked, his mouth practically hanging open.

  “Experience,” I said shortly.

  “Penn? What the fuck are you doing in here?” Rafe said as he passed through my bedroom doorway. He shook his head. “Never mind. Don’t care.” He nudged his older brother out of the way. Squatted down next to me. “Let’s see those gams, Will.”

  I chuckled. My Rafe was a sucker for film noir. I lifted the sheet away from my legs.

  He sucked in a noisy breath through his nose. “Shit sticks and cuttlefish, Will.”

  I looked at them again. Nodded. “You’re not wrong.”

  “Can you stand?”

  I shook my head. “I can’t get the leverage I need. They won’t bend.”

  All the men blew out a low whistle.

  I rolled my eyes. “Someone just lift me up, I can do the rest.”

  Rafe got to his feet, held out his hands.

  I put mine into his and gripped. He levered me up into a standing position. Fire from the pits of hell engulfed my thighs and calves in an instant. I blew out a breath as the pain swirled and spun in my head.

  I inhaled through my nose, counted to ten, pushed it out. In moments, pain melted from agony to bliss as my nerve endings fired at an almost constant rate. This was living. This was feeling.

  I focused on the feelings, catalogued each one as it surged through my brain. No two pain sensations were the same. And my library was always eager for new material.

  “Willow Koa,” Rafe said. His voice was strained.

  I blinked. Came back to the room. “What?” I shook my head. “What? Sorry.” I hunched my shoulders.

  He let go of one hand as he gripped my chin. “You were riding that wave pretty far. I will drug you.” His dark brown eyes were worried.

  Shit, shit, shit.

  “No, you won’t,” Ryker said. There was no room for argument or compromise in his tone. Just a simple statement that demanded compliance.

  Dom was in Ryker’s face in moments. “You don’t get a say here. Ever. Not with her.”

  I looked at the man who dared brave the Amatucci brothers’ wrath. His mouth was so firm his jaw muscles were twitching. His fingers were clenching and releasing at his sides. The corners of his eyes were pinched.

  When I met his gaze, he looked away. “You’re right. I shouldn’t have said anything.”

  Dom spun around, fumed silently as he struggled to get himself under control. His eyes clenched shut, I saw his lips moving as he counted to his favorite number. His lips formed the word sixteen. He opened his eyes again. He looked at me. “You promised.”

  I nodded. “And I wasn’t too far gone.” I didn’t know how to explain the difference to him. To any of them.

  I looked back at Rafe. His eyes were pinched, but worried. Unlike the rage that simmered in Dom’s. “I promise.”

  The youngest Amatucci studied me for long silent moments.

  I felt like a science experiment. But I let him see that I was fine. These men, this family, were the only ones allowed to see beyond my walls. They had earned it. Tenfold.

  Rafe nodded, leaned forward and pressed his lips to my forehead. “I expect an honest answer if it ever gets too high.”

  I bit my lip. Nodded. I knew what I could do inadvertently. Since death was never my goal, I allowed them to put restrictions on me. Allowed their love to bind me with silken restraints of family and promises.

  “But no morphine.” I looked up into his dark eyes. Let him see the strength of my conviction.

  “No morphine.”

  I nodded.

  My belly snarled.

  Everyone laughed.

  “Feed her or it’s going to get ugly,” Tali said from the back of the room. She was in new clothes, her h
air damp and finger combed. Sundays we usually all went to church. I guess my condition put the kibosh on that tradition.

  “Can you walk?” Rafe asked as he gripped my free hand once more.

  I shrugged. “I have no idea. I’ll guess we’ll see.” I looked at everyone still standing in my living room. “And I finally have an audience. All my dreams have come true.” I rolled my eyes.

  The Amatucci family members laughed.

  Ryker didn’t.

  Oh well. Except for that bit of sass to Dom, he seemed a little tame. Shame, really. His flirting game was on point.

  Rafe took a step back, our hands still grasped. “No time like the present.”

  I told my brain what I wanted it to do. But my legs either didn’t get the signal or my brain was being a bitch and not communicating. Or my legs didn’t work anymore.

  Since that last thought was untenable, I told my brain again. Move my legs.

  Nothing. We stood there, everyone watching me. Just like before. Stuck in a body that wouldn’t do what I told it. Stuck as a victim in a show I couldn’t control.

  “Back the fuck up, Penn. You’re not touching her,” Dom said as I felt the heat rise to my cheeks.

  “I helped her down the stairs, carried her physically from the hospital. I also know a thing or two about bodies.”

  I looked over to see Ryker and Dom in a staring contest.

  More like a pissing contest. And I was the one getting peed on.

  “If it doesn’t work, I won’t ever try again.” He looked back down at the arm Dom had gripped. He leaned towards the man I considered my brother. Spoke softly in Dom’s ear.

  Dom lifted his hand away. “One shot. And I’m holding you to that.”

  Ryker nodded. He tossed his briefcase down on my couch. Blew into his cupped hands. When he looked back up at me, his green eyes were dancing with mischief.

  He took Rafe’s spot in front of me. His hands not holding mine, but rather my chin. At his touch, I felt my belly pull in, my core muscles jerking back in shock. He didn’t touch me anywhere except my jaw, his touch light. His eyes commanding.

  “You look good drenched in pain, pet,” he said so softly, I had to concentrate to make out his words.

  Heat flooded my cheeks.

  He chuckled. “Close your eyes.”

  My lids fell without thought.

  His low rumbling growl skated chills down my arms. “Fuck,” he breathed out.

  I opened my eyes. “What’s wrong?”

  His green eyes were bright as fired emeralds. “Did I say you could open your eyes?”

  They fell closed on a sigh.

  “And you ask me what’s wrong.”

  My brow furrowed. I opened my mouth.

  He forced my chin closed. “No talking. Just moving.”

  I smiled, kept my eyes closed. “That’s the whole problem here, Mr. Penn.”

  Chapter 9 – Ryker

  I clenched my back teeth as my formal name spilled from her lips. She didn’t have a fucking clue what was going on, but her submission was about to land her under me. I’d give her some damned waves to ride.

  “Get the fuck on, Penn,” Domenico barked.

  Thank fuck he can’t see my face. He’d have me shot and buried so fast, Willow’s legs would still be black and blue.

  I winced again as I looked at her legs. They were perfectly shaped. Her hips plush enough to grip and not hit bone. Her legs would look fucking fantastic around my waist.

  “Mr. Penn?” Willow said softly. Her eyelids fluttered as if she were getting ready to open her eyes again.

  I growled at her.

  They lay still once more.

  Fuck. I needed to get her moving and get the fuck out of here. She was bad for my wellbeing. “Okay, Willow, put your hands on my waist.” Did I really need her touching me to maneuver her body? No. But no one else needed to know that.

  Her hands lifted slowly, a furrow tugged at her brow.

  “A little higher.” I think you meant a little lower, my inner deviant said. Shut the fuck up. I’m not really in the mood to be disemboweled today.

  Great, this woman has turned me into a schizophrenic. Or is it split personalities? Either one, I’m going crazy. Legitimately this time.

  Her small hands settled softly on my hip bones. Her fingers flexed into my body for a brief second. “Is this good?”

  No. Lower. “Yes.” I bit my cheek. This whole experiment was based on my knowledge of muscle memory and distraction. Let’s get the shitshow moving. “So when you called me Thor last night, were you thinking that I looked like Chris Hemsworth or someone hotter?” I took a small step back as I talked to her.

  She followed my motion as her mouth quirked up at the corner. “Chris Hemsworth is out of even your league, Ryker.”

  My fingers bit into her jaw. “That was rude.” I wanted to turn her over my knee. Out of my league. That was the biggest load of bullshit I’d ever heard. The man was a pansy compared to me.

  Her lips parted the smallest degree as my fingers tightened on her jaw. Her lashes fluttered as her eyes flicked from side to side under the thin veil of her lids. Her mouth ticked up. “Uh oh. Should I offer to kiss it and make it better?” One brow rose high.

  Domenico growled. “You’re not kissing anything. Neither is he.”

  I lowered my voice as I took another step back. “Anytime you want to kiss it, you just let me know, pet.”

  She snorted. Right in my face. Her eyes closed, her hands on my hips, she rebuffed me. Her nose wrinkled. “Nah.” She lifted her face slightly. “Now if you had Chris Hemsworth available, maybe.” She tipped her head to the side. “Probably. A good, definite probably on that one.”

  I growled at her. “That’s two, pet.” I took another step back.

  “Two what?” Her steps were hesitant and stiff, but we were making progress.

  “Two times you’ve insulted me. In less than two minutes even.”

  She shrugged. “I’m sorry your ego is so flimsy. You might want to work on that.” She wet her bottom lip, eyes still closed.

  I narrowed my eyes at her. Flimsy ego? I’d earned every part of my ego, little girl. “So when you suggested I put you in my bed or yours, did you have any preference?”

  Her brow furrowed again. “I never said that.”

  I stopped walking. “Open your eyes.”

  Her mossy green irises greeted me in an instant. I searched their depths. “You really don’t remember, do you?”

  She tilted her head to the side. “What am I supposed to be remembering?”

  I tried a different track. “What’s the last thing you remember before waking up in my penthouse.”

  She rolled her eyes. “You sound incredibly pretentious when you say it that way. My penthouse.” She dropped her voice into what I was assuming was supposed to be an imitation of me. She shook her head. “I remember escaping the bathroom at the hospital when…he came in and had Tali removed.” She looked over my shoulder. Looked back at me. “Why?”

  “You don’t remember me saving you from the…him?” I studied her.

  Her eyes widened. She shook her head. “No. How did you do that?”

  I shook my head.

  She squeezed her hands at my hips. “Tell me.”

  I narrowed my eyes at her.

  She smiled prettily. “Please.”

  Fuck. She’s not allowed to smile again. Ever. I told her what happened.

  Her eyes were wide and her mouth made the most tempting O I’d ever seen. My dick would fill it quite nicely. But I also wanted to taste it. Taste her. Write her flavor on my mind. Write my name in her flesh with my whip. “You don’t remember any of that, but you remember that you called me Thor?”

  She blinked a few times. Nodded her head, her brow furrowed. “Why would I only remember that part?” She looked up at me, sage green eyes wide.

  I shook my head. Part of me was thankful she didn’t remember any of the rest of it. I’d made an ass out of
myself flirting with her as we’d climbed down those stairs.

  But another part of me, a part I rarely acknowledged, was pissed it had been wiped from her memory. One of the few times I behaved like a real live human and the only witness doesn’t remember it.

  I shook my head again. “It doesn’t matter. Close your eyes. We’re almost there.”

  Her lids slammed shut immediately.

  “And I’m almost a century old. Hurry the fuck up, Penn. We still need to get to the DA’s office before it closes,” Domenico said.

  I rolled my eyes. The man was bossy. And whiny with it. The business day had officially started an hour ago. We weren’t exactly racing daylight right now.

  “Ever been dancing?” I asked Willow.

  She shook her head. Nodded.

  I laughed. “Which one, pet?”

  “It depends on what kind of dancing you’re talking about.”

  “Formal?” I retreated another step, forced her to join me in movement.

  She nodded.

  “Club?”

  She shook her head. “I’ve tried, it just looks like I’m a decapitated chicken in death throes.”

  I burst into laughter.

  A soft smile bloomed on her face. Her head tilted to the side. “You should laugh more. It’s beautiful.”

  My mirth eased. “Can’t do that. I’ve got a rep to uphold.”

  She snorted. “Real bad boy, huh?”

  Déjà vu slapped me in the face. Hard. “Yeah. Terrified mothers on reference to prove it.”

  “I don’t know that bad boys help strangers walk across their apartments.”

  “I’m on a redemption kick.”

  She lost her smile. “Then you need to save it for someone else. You won’t get enough points from helping me.” She lowered her face, dislodging my hands.

  “You think I’m that much of a lost cause, huh?” I asked her softly.

  Her eyes flew open, horror written on her face. “No. No, that’s not what I meant at all.” She studied me for a moment.

  I barely kept the smile off my face.

  She pinched my hip. “That was a horrible thing to do.”